Last Friday was Chemo #11 – for those who are counting (like ME!). This was my eleventh dose of Taxol and third dose of Zomeda (the bone builder). We started off chemo with a nurse, who, well, had her own way of doing things. When she told me my veins were too small and that I should have gotten a port, I knew we were in for a bit of a rocky road. She made one unsuccessful attempt to start my IV and then got someone else to do it. Fortunately, the other nurse was one I had had before, and he started it without any fuss. While he did that, I implored that he switch and be my nurse for the day. It turned out that he did switch, and it was smooth sailing after that. I just had a sense that the first nurse wasn’t going to be a good fit for me when she wasn’t listening to what I was saying at all and was telling me that I was sensitive and fragile – I was thinking, “You have no idea who you are dealing with…”. At this point, I’m no amateur when it comes to chemo, and we’ve sorted out what works best for me… plus I don’t have a lot of patience, so I was glad we were able to make that switch. Would have been far more unpleasant had we not. As always, Marchus was right by my side cheering me on.
The fatigue is really catching up with me now. I’m really lucky that it has taken until now for it to really start to hit me. Some people have terrible fatigue from the beginning. So, I’m counting my blessings that I’ve made it this far without it being too bad. Now, it is kind of always there, sitting on my shoulder. In some ways, it’s a reminder that the chemo is in my body and that it is working. I keep telling myself that it’s a good sign. I do feel badly, though, that I don’t have the energy to play with my boys and that I rely so heavily on Marchus to carry the parenting load at the end of the day. I know that it is temporary and that soon enough, I’ll have the energy to participate more.
My sister came to visit for the weekend. It was really wonderful to see her. I’m so blessed to share such a close and wonderful friendship with her. We had a great time, the boys adore her, and she makes a really fantastic eggplant parmesan!! She and her family of adventurous souls are headed to India on Sunday for a month. May they be safe and have a wonderful trip. I’ll be glad when they are home on July 24th.
Being a bit of a control freak, I have found that since I can’t nail down dates in my calendar for the end of chemo, surgery or radiation – because they are all dependant on the scan results and the Tumor Board, I’ve had to fill my calendar with other things to check off the days. I’ve found this really helps because as we move closer to the events on my calendar, I’m moving closer to being cured. So in July, I’m looking forward to our Independence Day block party, camping with old pals, Matthew’s second birthday party, Relay for Life and a family reunion – phew… I think I have all the weekends covered. All good things. If you haven’t yet checked out Relay for Life – I’m participating on July 24th. Feel free to sponsor me at this link:
http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RFLFY10CA?px=17108793&pg=personal&fr_id=20475&fl=en_US&et=zkmKzUeTpD8p0v5MB0YiTg..&s_tafId=408397
So, this Friday will be Chemo #12 – a dozen! I can’t believe it. This seemed SO far off when I first started and was given my list of dates… and now it is almost here. I’m looking forward to having a little reprieve next week, though the PET/CT scan and MRI next week have me a little on edge. I have in my mind all the positive thoughts for good results, but there is a bit of fear wrapped in there. I just have to keep reminding myself to expect good news. So, keep up the prayers and positive thoughts… another milestone is around the corner. Marchus has been great at reminding me of the positive path we are on and that we have no reason to anticipate anything less than great results…
Thanks to all for your support, inspiration and prayers…
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